Which are your favorite motivational quotes?
Is there such a thing as funny motivational quotes?
Of course! I mean, why can’t we have a little fun and be motivated at the same time?
We don’t often feature funny quotes on Wealthy Gorilla, but after compiling this list, I’ll make an exception. Some of the quotes below are pure gold!
Here are 60 short and funny motivational quotes to help brighten your day:
Table of Contents
60 Short & Funny Motivational Quotes
1. “When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.” – Unknown
2. “Age is of no importance unless you’re a cheese.” – Billie Burke
3. “Change is not a four letter word… but often your reaction to it is!” – Jeffrey Gitomer
4. “Every tattoo is temporary, because we’re all slowly dying.” – Unknown
5. “I am an early bird and a night owl… so I am wise and I have worms.” – Michael Scott
6. “I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not so sure.” – Unknown
7. “It could be that your purpose in life is to serve as a warning to others.” – Ashleigh Brilliant
8. “Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.” – Mark Twain
9. “The best things in life are actually really expensive.” – Unknown
10. “The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces.” – Will Rogers
11. “Well-behaved women seldom make history.” – Laurel Thatcher Ulrich
12th of 60 Funny Motivational Quotes
“Work until your bank account looks like a phone number.” – Unknown
13. “A clear conscience is a sure sign of a bad memory.” – Mark Twain
14. “Always remember that you are unique – just like everybody else.” – Unknown
15. “Don’t worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in Australia.” – Charles Schulz
16. “Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.” – Robert Bloch
17. “I am so clever that sometimes I don’t understand a single word of what I am saying.” – Oscar Wilde
18. “If at first you don’t succeed, then skydiving definitely isn’t for you.” – Steven Wright
19. “It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing, but I couldn’t give it up because by then I was too famous.” – Robert Benchley
20. “Nothing is impossible, the word itself says “I’m possible!” – Audrey Hepburn
21st of 60 Funny Motivational Quotes
“The difference between genius and stupidity is; genius has its limits.” – Albert Einstein
22. “The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.” – Terry Pratchett
23. “When I hear somebody sigh, “Life is hard”, I am always tempted to ask, “Compared to what?”” – Sydney Harris
24. “You can’t have everything. Where would you put it?” – Steven Wright
25. “A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.” – Steve Martin
26. “Bad decisions make good stories.” – Ellis Vidler
27. “Dreams are like rainbows. Only idiots chase them.” – Unknown
28. “Happiness is just sadness that hasn’t happened yet.” – Unknown
29. “I cannot afford to waste my time making money.” – Louis Agassiz
30. “If the world didn’t suck we’d all fly into space.” – Unknown
31. “Leadership is the art of getting someone else to do something you want done because he wants to do it.” – Dwight D. Eisenhower
32. “Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.” – Thomas Edison
33. “The elevator to success is out of order. You’ll have to use the stairs, one step at a time.” – Joe Girard
34. “Think like a proton. Always positive.” – Unknown
35th of 60 Funny Motivational Quotes
“When I’m sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead.” – Barney Stinson
36. “You can’t wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club.” – Jack London
37. “A diamond is merely a lump of coal that did well under pressure.” – Unknown
38. “Be happy – it drives people crazy.” – Unknown
39. “Even a stopped clock is right twice every day. After some years, it can boast of a long series of successes.” – Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach
40. “Honest criticism is hard to take, particularly from a relative, a friend, an acquaintance, or a stranger.” – Franklin P. Jones
41. “I didn’t fail the test. I just found 100 ways to do it wrong.” – Benjamin Franklin
42. “If you let your head get too big, it’ll break your neck.” – Elvis Presley
43. “Life is like a sewer – what you get out of it depends on what you put into it.” – Tom Lehrer
44. “People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing—that’s why we recommend it daily.” – Zig Ziglar
45. “The light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off due to budget cuts.” – Unknown
46. “Too much of a good thing can be wonderful.” – Mae West
47. “When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.” – Cathy Guisewite
48. “You must learn from the mistakes of others. You can’t possibly live long enough to make them all yourself.” – Sam Levenson
49. “A few harmless flakes working together can unleash an avalanche of destruction.” – Justin Sewell
50th of 60 Funny Motivational Quotes
“By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve hours a day.” – Robert Frost
51. “Even if you are on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.” – Will Rogers
52. “I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realise I should have been more specific.” – Lily Tomlin
53. “I have a simple philosophy: Fill what is empty. Empty what is full. Scratch where it itches.” – Alice Roosevelt Longworth
54. “If you think you are too small to be effective, you have never been in the dark with a mosquito.” – Betty Reese
55. “Live each day like it’s your second to the last. That way you can fall asleep at night.” – Jason Love
56. “People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.” – Winnie the Pooh
57. “The question isn’t who is going to let me, it’s who is going to stop me.” – Ayn Rand
58. “Trying is the first step toward failure.” – Homer Simpson
59. “Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition.” – Marilyn Monroe
60. “You’re only given a little spark of madness. You mustn’t lose it.” – Robin Williams
Which are your favorite short and funny motivational quotes? Leave a comment below.
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